Finding Hope
by Hipster Blood Ritual
Summary: Rose's past comes back to haunt her, right when she thought she'd forgotten. When Jimmy Stone comes back to claim his promise of forever, will the Doctor be able to save her? Rated for language, suggestive themes and rape. Don't like, don't read.
1. Chapter 1

"I'm going out with Shareen, mum." Rose looked into the kitchen.

"Fine, fine." Jackie waved her on. "Be back for dinner."

"Gotcha." Rose blew her a kiss. "Can I have a few pounds?"

Jackie rolled her eyes. "In my purse."

"Thanks mum."

…

"Rose." Shareen said bluntly. "You're totally infatuated with him."

"We love eachother." Rose smiled. "He's asked me to move in with him."

"You're 16." Shareen said. "You can't move in with him!"

"Watch me." Rose grinned. "We might even get married."

Shareen shook her head. "Think about this Rose. What'll your mother say?"

Rose frowned. "I'm doing it anyway. No matter what."

Shareen grimaced. "How did you meet him, again?"

"He works in the grocery store." Rose said. "He was restocking the sugar. Mum sent me for some sugar, cuz we were out, and I grabbed some, but I tripped, right? I fell onto the box he was unloading, and he laughed. I got up, and I saw him and he was really cute. So of course I went all stupid, but he just laughed and asked for my number."

"Right." Shareen said. "He didn't even help you up?"

"I could manage perfectly on my own, thanks."

Shareen nodded. "Yeah, but did he even ask if you were okay?"

"I dunno." Rose said. "That was months ago. And I was a little preoccupied."

"That was only a month ago." Shareen told her. "And the other problem is- he's 20!"

"It feels like so much longer!" Rose protested. "And age is just a number."

Shareen sighed. "I can't talk you out of this, can I?"

Rose shook her head. "No."

"Well, what about school?"

"I'm still going to school!" Rose said. "I'm gonna graduate high school."

"And college?"

Rose waved her hand. "Overrated. I can get a perfectly good job without an expensive piece of paper."

Shareen nodded. "Okay, I can agree with that. But still, you're 16!"

"I don't care!" Rose cried. "We love eachother!"

"What happens when you find out you don't though?"

Rose laughed. "That won't happen!"

Shareen sighed. "This is a bad idea Rose."

Rose frowned. "You can think that, but I'm not changing my mind. I'm telling mum tonight."

"Okay then." Shareen nodded. "Still, keep in mind that my flat's open for ya. You know, just in case."

Rose nodded. "Thanks, Shareen." She got up to go. "See you later."

"Bye."

As she left the restaurant, Rose pulled out her cell phone. She dialed quickly. "Hey! It's me! I'm telling mum tonight, so I'll be out of there tonight or tomorrow. Come by with your truck, I'll have a few bags. Bye! I love you."

That done, Rose set off for home, heart pounding. She'd never done anything so against the rules before.

…

Rose decided to broach the subject over dinner.

"Mum?" She began.

"What is it, sweetie?" Her mum didn't look up from the gossip mag she was reading.

"I've decided to move in with Jimmy."

Jackie looked up. "Haha. Very funny. Let me read in peace, why don't you?"

Rose groaned inwardly. "I'm serious, mum."

Jackie looked up again. "You're 16, Rose. You're not moving in with anyone."

"Well, it's my choice, isn't it?"

"Ha!" Jackie laughed. "You're still my UNDERAGE daughter. It's MY choice."

"Well, can't you say yes?"

"No." Jackie shut the magazine. "Listen, Rose, Jimmy is not the kind of man I want you to be around."

"Why not?" Rose asked. "He's wonderful."

"No," Jackie said. "He's not. If you move in with him, you'll regret it for the rest of your life."

"I don't want anyone but him." Rose argued. "And I know he feels the same."

"The answer's no, Rose. And until you're 18, it'll stay that way. I don't even know why you asked me. You should know better."

"Fine." Rose frowned. It was time to play dirty. "What about when you were 16? I happen to know that was when you moved in with Dad."

Jackie looked stricken. "That's different."

"Not so much." Rose smiled inwardly. "And Grandmum told me that she told you that Dad wasn't a good man to be around. Exactly what you just said."

Jackie's eyes shone. "Rose..."

"Dad was great!" Rose said. "And I know Jimmy will be too!"

Jackie shook her head. "Rose, I can't..."

"Mum, all I'm asking is your permission. I'm all grown up, I can take care of myself."

"Rose..." Jackie reached out for her hand. "This is not a good idea."

"It'll be fine." Rose insisted. "And if things don't work out, I'll be back here."

As if. Rose knew what she and Jimmy had was real.

Jackie sighed. "Do what you like Rose. Just be careful. And come see me once in awhile."

Rose could almost dance. "Thank you mum!"

She jumped up and ran to her room to pack her bags.

Jackie put her head in her hands.

**A/N**

**I just made a couple little edits on this chapter. Paragraph breaks and crap. Seeing as they didn't show up when I posted it. Sorry for the confusion.**


	2. Chapter 2

Rose waited until it was dark for Jimmy to come by with his truck.

When it was clear he wasn't coming, she hoisted her bags up and walked the three miles to his flat. By the time she got there, it was almost 10. She knocked on the door.

It opened, after awhile.

"Rosie!" Jimmy pulled her in. "Are you here for good?"

"Yeah." Rose nodded, looking about the room. "Did you get my message?"

Jimmy looked stricken. "Yeah. Razor borrowed the truck. Sorry."

"But I saw the truck downstairs."

"Oh." Jimmy figeted. "He must have returned it."

Well, she wasn't going to push the issue. "Where can I put my stuff?"

"In the bedroom." Jimmy waved her on.

She nodded, then went in the door. The whole flat was filthy. It was lucky she didn't hate cleaning.

She put her bags on the floor. The dresser and closet were overflowing with dirty clothes. There was nowhere to put her clothes.

Right. She tried not to feel ignored. She'd thought that he would have made room for her half of the closet. She'd thought he would have cleared out some space for her stuff, maybe cleaned up a bit. Made something nice to eat.

But he was busy, she concluded. He worked 7 days a week. He didn't have time to clean.

But now she was here to help! She would clean up the flat, cook him nice meals, maybe once and awhile they would go out to eat.

She looked into the filthy bathroom, which actually had a washer and dryer.

She left the bedroom, into the front room, with a tiny TV, a tiny couch and a tiny table. The kitchen led off of that room.

"Hey, babe." Jimmy beckoned from the couch where he was sprawled. "Wanna come watch with me?"

Well, there was nothing else to do. She walked to the couch, and waited for him to make room for her. But he didn't, so she sat gingerly on the disgusting carpet. He was watching a mindless show about time travel. Like she'd ever need that.

She zoned out, and planned her cleaning strategies while he watched.

After an hour or so, he flipped the TV off. "Time for bed." he said, as he got off the couch. "Coming?"

She nodded. She was exhausted from her walk. Bed sounded nice.

Except it was totally filthy. Jimmy flopped down on the bed, without getting undressed. He switched off the light. "Come on, Rosie."

She sighed and got into the bed next to him, clothes still on.

They weren't on for long. Jimmy was very rough when he wanted something. And now that she was living with him, he could have her.

That was the night she lost her virginity. In a filthy bed, with a man so used to sex, he didn't let her get used to the pain.

She told herself, convinced herself, later, that she liked it. That's the way it would have been, no matter if she'd waited.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

The next day, Jimmy left for work early. He didn't say goodbye, or give her a kiss, like men were supposed to do when they left for work. He just left, wearing the same clothes.

She got out of bed later, very sore. But she made herself some dry cereal, as the milk had gone bad. Then she started cleaning. She didn't even stop for lunch.

By the time Jimmy got home, the flat was clean, the washer and dryer were working overtime, and there was a big bowl of pasta on the table.

Rose looked up at him hopefully.

"This is great, Rosie." Jimmy sat down at the table and began to eat. "Good food too."

It wasn't a thank you, but maybe it was as close as it was going to get. Rose joined him at the table.

That night, after more mindless TV, they got into the now clean bed. Rose was almost fainting from exhaustion, but Jimmy wanted sex. And what he wanted, he got.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

The days started to bleed together. Rose would wake up, eat something for breakfast (usually leftovers from dinner), clean up the messes Jimmy had made, eat more leftovers for lunch, do laundry, go shopping, make dinner, eat dinner (with no thanks from Jimmy), watch TV, let him use her body (she didn't like to call it 'making love', because that implied that the two parties were willing), and go to sleep.

She'd stopped going to school about 3 weeks after she'd moved in with him. There was no reason why she needed to go. And, as Jimmy told her, she was too stupid to amount to much anyway. She'd known that already, from her reports, but it still hurt to hear him say it.

Some days stood out. She went with Shareen to the local chip shop for lunch, she visited her mum's regularly for tea. She always reassured them that everything was hunky-dory.

Even though even she was starting to have her doubts.


	3. Chapter 3

But everything wasn't okay.

Rose was tired, she was hurting. It had been almost two months since she'd left her mum's house. Sometimes she was amazed that the time had gone by so fast, other times she missed her old flat so much it hurt.

Now that she wasn't going to school, she did have more free time on her hands. When she wasn't cleaning and cooking, she'd go for walks through the city.

She didn't really care where she ended up, as long as she could get out of the stuffy flat for a while.

All while she walked, she thought. Mostly about the what-if's. And the could-be's.

Like what if she could still be safe in her pink bedroom in her mum's flat, still a virgin, still innocent, still going to school, and still happy?

Was she not happy?

She mused over this one question as she walked through the park. Small children played happily on the jungle gym.

Certainly she had wanted this. She had wanted to be the woman in Jimmy's life. But she knew she wasn't the only one. On the off day that she made him angry, he would leave the flat for a few hours, then come back smelling of nicotine discharge and cheap perfume.

So maybe it wasn't the ideal setting her mind had created, but really, does that setting ever exist?

She consoled herself with that thought as she sat down carefully on a bench.

Besides, he really could be quite sweet. Several times he had brought them out to the local cheap chip shop, and bought them ice cream after. He was cute and funny then, and she could briefly see glimpses of the Jimmy she'd fallen for.

Those nights, she was happy to give him her body. It could be called pleasant.

But those days were so few and far between. Sometimes she wondered if it really was worth it. She worked so hard for him, cleaning, cooking, letting him use her body, she was starting to look sick and weak.

But then when she thought of leaving, she would realize that then, there would be no one to help him with his work, and he would become a slob again.

It was a vicious circle, and Rose was right in the middle.

And she couldn't find the strength or the willpower to change it.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Over the past few weeks, she had cut herself off entirely from any social life. She just looked so terrible. The constant work, forced sex every night and the fact that Jimmy was starting to hurt her.

It was usually just a poke, or a pinch, or a shove. But sometimes he tripped her while she was carrying glass, or something of the sort.

Bandaged hands, bruised arms and sleepless eyes didn't make a pretty picture for anyone.

So Rose spent her time in the dark little flat, with nothing to do, nowhere to go.

She wanted to leave. But what would her mum say? She couldn't bear an 'I told you so', and she couldn't trust anyone else. Her mate, Shareen, would call the police, and that was something that shouldn't happen. Rose knew that Jimmy had started using heavier drugs since she'd started living with him. She could taste it when he kissed her, when he breathed, when he sweated.

She was positive she would be dragged into cross-questioning if the police ever found him out.

But she missed her old flat so badly!

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

It had been about 12 weeks of constant work for Rose when something finally changed.

She had taken 4 pills of asprin to combat the incredible pain that just kept seeping over her body. It had made her feel marginally better; enough to do some laundry. It was around lunchtime when the door to the flat crashed open.

Rose nearly dropped her lunch plate. She was in no shape to handle a burglar. She wasn't even sure if her voice was working well enough to shout for help. Still, she took a deep breath.

But it was just Jimmy.

And he was mad.

"You fucking whore!" he screamed at her, his face purple.

She could smell the drugs on the breeze he made as he stormed into the kitchen.

"What is it?" she asked timidly.

"I got some time off work, and I was coming home to relax with the TV, and I happened to bump into a fellow named Jack." he growled. "Sound familiar?"

"N-no." Rose stuttered out the truth, totally scared of Jimmy at the moment. The last time he'd been mad, he'd shoved her against the wall, hard enough to knock her unconscious.

He leaned down to her face level. "He seemed pretty darn familiar with you. He told me to stop hurting you!" Jimmy laughed loudly and grabbed her arm. "You know what I did? To the man whose been fooling around with my girl?"

Rose stared in mute terror.

"I told him FUCK OFF! Then you know what I did! I punched him so hard it snapped his scrawny little neck!" Jimmy's face was blue now, from the insane laughing and all the crap he'd inhaled over the course of the day. His mind was smashed under the drugs.

Rose blanched. He was a murderer!

"And now I've got to punish this little whore right here!"

"Jimmy!" Rose finally found her voice. "Please! I didn't-"

"I have proof!" Jimmy grasped her arm in an iron fist.

"But I've never-"

"Shut up, you fucking whore!" Jimmy screamed. "You belong to me! You don't go fooling around with pretty-boys!"

"Jimmy!" Rose was in full on panic mode. Something bad was about to happen. "Let go of me!"

"I said, SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Jimmy threw her to the floor.

She stared up at him through her hair and tears, as the sound of police sirens from the lot downstairs filled the room.

She heard Jimmy swear loudly, and then step on her arm, hard, as he left the kitchen.

She felt a sharp ache, then nothing. Everything slowly faded to black.

She wondered vaguely if she might be dying.

She hoped heaven had a soft clean bed for her to sleep on.

**A/N**

**This one was slightly inspired from Captain Jack's line in Utopia, when he told the Doctor that he'd gone to see Rose grow up during the 90's. He said he didn't talk to her, but to me, Jack's not the type of person who'd just watch this all happen. So he intervened. And of course, Rose probably wouldn't remember anyway.**

**Anyway, wow! The amount of story alerts and reviews was epic! (To me, anyway, an amateur… ) I guess everyone really wanted a type of story like this. This is seriously amazing. I hope I'm doing the story justice. **

**Currently, I'm in the process of rewriting all the chapters I'd previously written, because I found them to be unsatisfactory. So updates will take a teensy bit longer, but I'll try to do a chapter a night. Sound okay?**

**Thanks so, so much for all the reviews. They keep me writing, and writing well. **


	4. Chapter 4

It was quiet and dark when Rose finally woke. It was totally black, in fact, which made her panic until she realized that her eyes were shut.

She carefully opened them, taking in her surroundings. She was on a hospital bed in a small ward, lit by glowing yellow lights. It was eight o'clock at night, said a small clock on the nightstand.

Her arm was wrapped securely in a plaster cast, along with bandages on most of the rest of her body. An IV was dripping into the crook of her arm.

As her body slowly woke up, she became aware of the aching. Her entire body seemed to be a big bruise. How was that possible?

Beside that point, how did she get here? What had happened to Jimmy, who was apparently guilty of murder? What had happened in general? Was Jimmy arrested? Was she okay?

A light snore brought her back to the room. Rose looked to the chair beside her bed. There was her mum, fast asleep, obviously completely exhausted from sitting near Rose for who knows how long.

Rose sighed and settled her body more comfortably against the uncomfortable bed. She tried to make sense of everything.

The slight movement and rustling of the sheets caused Jackie to sit bolt upright. "Rose!"

"I'm fine." Rose whispered.

"You're awake!" Jackie rushed to the side of the bed. "Thank God!"

"How long was I out?" Rose asked. The first of a lot of questions.

"Just less than two days." Jackie explained. "The police found you."

"How did everything happen?" Rose asked. "I don't remember anything."

"Of course not." Jackie patted her arm. "The police followed Jimmy home from where he was buying drugs, and they arrested him as he tried to run. They went in the house to find evidence, and you were lying on the floor, unconscious, with a broken arm. They called the ambulance, and found out who you were, then found me."

Rose nodded. But something didn't make sense. "Jimmy came home and told me he- oh my god- he told me he murdered someone- a man named Jack!"

Jackie blanched. "He what?"

Rose relayed the story. "I heard the police outside, but he threw me on the ground and stomped on my arm. I guess that must have been when I blacked out."

Jackie reached for her hand. "You should tell the investigator that. Now that you're awake they'll be coming round to ask you some questions."

Rose sighed. She knew this was going to happen. She wished it wasn't under these circumstances though.

"When?"

Jackie waved her hand. "Tomorrow, probably. You're going to be here for awhile. You have the broken arm, obviously, but you actually have a cracked rib- two in fact- and you have bruises all over you. And you're undernourished."

Rose hadn't quite guessed that much. She made a small noise of surprise.

Jackie nodded. "You're going to heal up just fine. The doctor was going to come in and see you when you woke up, though."

Sure enough, the door to the small room opened, and a tall, skinny man with floppy black curls walked in. He pulled up the round stool in the room up next to the bed.

"Hullo Rose" The doctor smiled. "I'm Doctor Holmes. Are you feeling okay?"

Rose cocked an eyebrow. "I feel like I was run over by a truck."

The doctor huffed out a laugh. "We can always administer more painkillers. Just tell me if you need them."

Rose nodded. That wasn't really necessary.

Doctor Holmes stood up. "I'm  
>just going to look over your injuries to see how you're doing, okay?"<p>

Rose nodded. She was starting to feel extremely exhausted.

But the adrenal spike and the feeling of utter terror as the doctor carefully undid her hospital gown woke her up straightaway.

She brought her knees up to her chin, burying her face in them. It was inexplicable. But for some reason, she was totally terrified of him touching her. Her body refused to listen to her mind.

The doctor carefully backed away. "Right." he wrote something down on his clipboard. "We thought this might have happened."

Jackie reached out to comfort Rose. "What happened?"

The doctor frowned in sympathy. "This happens often to victims of rape and domestic violence. They often become afraid of other men touching them."

Jackie rubbed Rose's back. "How long will it last?"

The doctor shrugged. "It depends on the person. Some cases, the fear stays with them their entire lives. Other times, they can easily get over it, although it takes time."

Jackie nodded, and tried to look brave, as she stroked Rose's huddled form.

"I'll send in the female doctor." Doctor Holmes made a carefully hasty retreat.

"It's okay Rose." Jackie murmured. "He's gone now. Nothing to worry about."

Rose once again laid flat on the bed. Her eyes sparkled with tears. "Is that true?" she asked her mother. "Am I wrecked for life?"

"Of course not." Jackie reassured her. "We Tyler women are the strongest around. We always bounce back."

Rose nodded. She hoped against hope that her mother was right. She couldn't go through life with an irrational fear of men.

What else had Jimmy destroyed for her? She supposed she was going to have to wait and find out as the details revealed themselves.

Jackie squeezed her hand. "You should sleep, sweetheart."

Rose nodded. But she had to say something first. "Okay. But mum?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry."

Jackie looked perplexed. "For what?"

The tears started to fall. "For not believing you about Jimmy. For making you let me go live with him."

Tears started to sparkle in Jackie's eyes now. "Sweetheart, you don't have to worry about that. I should have known better than to let you convince me. I am the mother, after all."

"Still." Rose insisted. "It was my fault."

"No, it was both of ours." Jackie sighed. "Now you need to sleep. But I accept your apology. Really."

Rose smiled. "Okay. Good night. I love you.

"Love you too." Jackie held Rose's hand until she fell asleep.

**A/N  
>Again, the amount of people who are reading this is totally mind-blowing. Just looking in my email and seeing all those gives me a mood lift.<strong>

**I don't know how I'm doing with all the updating~ but hopefully it's okay.**

**Keep enjoying the story! Thanks a million for all those reviews and favourites and alerts!**


	5. Chapter 5

The next few weeks blended together. It was a monotony of hospital food, and sleep. Jackie went home and back to work when it was clear Rose was healing well. It was also clear she was getting a little fed up with her mum's constant check-ins.

Once she had the IV taken out of her arm and regained the abitity to eat, Rose felt slightly more alive. She lived off chocolate pudding and cranberry juice. With liveliness came antsyness. She wanted to go home and regain some sort of life for herself.

The doctors let up on her enough to allow her to take daily walks through the hospital complex. Rose found herself wandering the halls farther and farther each day, not wanting to return to the annoying monotony of the little hospital room.

As she ghosted through the usually empty and dark halls, she meditated on questions she had no answers to. What was she going to do, now that she was free of him? Those prospects seemed huge and scary. But somehow exciting.

The more frightening question she refused to contemplate was: What if he came back?

She remembered those dark, painful nights as she sat down by a dark door in a dark hall. They haunted her dreams as she slept, wherever and whenever she slept. She could see his dark, stormy face, so full of hatred and lust. Even toward the end, when his eyes and breath were full of drugs, she could see the lust in his face. Not good lust either. Bad, scary, greedy.

She grabbed her head in her hands. She wanted the images to disappear.

'Forget, forget, forget.' she would chant to herself as the nights relived themselves in her mind.

They wouldn't leave. Rose huddled against the wall, squeezing her eyes shut against the onslaught.

'Forget, forget, forget.'

When the images became more than her shattered confidence and sense of self could handle, she would make her way back to the monotony of the hospital room.

At least that wasn't dark and frightening.

Unless she closed her eyes. Then she would see his angry face, coming closer and closer.

She would wake up, either crying, gasping or screaming. Sometimes all three.

Once, the doctors gave her sleeping pills so she would be able to rest.

The pills only held her in the darkness of sleep, where he came and violated her body and her mind. She couldn't wake up, so there was no escape.

When the pills finally wore off, her pillow was soaked with tears and her body hurt all over, like she'd been thrashing around. Or hurting herself.

The doctors didn't give her any more pills.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Although it seemed like such a long time, it was soon decided that Rose could finally go home. Her arm was still wrapped in a pink cast, but the rest of her injuries had healed.

Physically, at least.

Mentally, she was positive, she would never be the same again. Jimmy had destroyed whatever confidence she'd once had. She had no sense of self-confidence, no sense of accomplishment.

Basically, she was going to have to build herself back up, starting from the very rock bottom.

And she started. She went out, as soon as her arm had healed, and got a job at a shop. All day long, folding clothes and restocking shelves.

Monotony.

Yet still she woke up every night, the images of those terrible nights seared into her dreams.

And still, she couldn't bear the proximity of any male. She would panic, and make a hasty retreat, not bothering to make an excuse.

Whenever this happened, once she was safely huddled on the ground, away from everyone, she would try to convince herself that, really, nothing bad was going to happen. The random man wasn't Jimmy. Random guys wouldn't do things like that.

Rose began to be disgusted at herself; at her behavior toward people in general. Each time she got scared, she would become angrier at herself for it. But she couldn't stop being scared. So she just got angrier.

Another vicious circle wound its ugly way around her. This one may have had even worse consequences, if it wasn't for Mickey.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.  
><strong><br>A/N  
>Eeesh. This one's really short. Sorry. I have to end it there though. I'll try to update within the next day though, to compensate.<strong>

**Twenty minutes to midnight, so I'll be off to bed.**

**:) I hope y'all are still enjoying it! I'm seriously enjoying writing it!**


	6. Chapter 6

Mickey had grown up with Rose. Well, kind of. When she was born, he'd been about 5. His mum had been friends with Jackie, so he'd spent a lot of time at Rose's house, playing with her, as their mums gossiped.

He kind of began to see himself as her protector, or maybe her older brother. He was always there for her. As she grew up, he'd always be there with her.

After his parents died, Mickey spent most of his time hanging out with Rose. She had a quality that somehow made him feel better.

They were best friends.

So the trouble came as Rose grew older. As she got older, she got prettier. And Mickey started to fall for her.

But Rose needed her older brother to be there for her. She went through boys like crazy, each one wanting a pretty blonde.

But Rose was sensible. She didn't do anything she'd regret. She usually didn't even like any of the boys she went out with anyway.

But it was different when she met Jimmy. Mickey could see she'd fallen head over heels for him. He was totally jealous, naturally, but the danger Rose was putting herself into was more important.

She told him her plan to move in with Jimmy before she told Shareen.

He'd told her it was a stupid idea. That she would regret it. That it was dangerous. That she should stay safe in her real home.

She shoved him. She told him that he was supposed to be her older brother- that he was supposed to support what she wanted to do.

He was too much of a fraidy-cat to tell her that he wasn't going to support her stupid decisions, so she walked away.

Later in the week, Rose came by. She looked tired. Very tired. When he'd asked her what was wrong, she'd told him everything was fine. She apologized for shoving him and yelling at him.

He'd hugged her, and told her he was sorry too, for telling her it was stupid.

Then she got up to go. Her last sentence to him was branded in his mind.

"I'm sorry." she'd said, tears filling up her eyes. "I can't see you anymore. He doesn't like it when I see other men."

Then she ran out the door. He wouldn't have any knowledge of her for the next couple months.

He stopped dwelling on it, preferring to think that Rose had moved on. She was all grown up. She didn't need her older brother- who was also hopelessly in love with her- anymore.

So when his cellphone rang, one rainy evening, he was astounded to hear her voice coming through it. "Can you come over?" she asked him. "I really need you."

He'd started running then, all the way to Jackie's, where it was obvious she'd be.

He knocked on the door, and she pulled it open. They stared at eachother, he in shock, she in silent plea. And mutual fright.

She looked horrible. As she invited him in onto the couch, he kept staring. Her arm was bound up in a pink cast, and the fading outlines of bruises decorated her body. While she looked bad now, it was clear to him that she'd looked a lot worse.

"Want some tea?" she asked him.

He nodded, still shocked.

She disappeared into the kitchen.

He switched on the TV, something to distract him from her obvious pain. He was dying to know what happened, but he'd made a pretty good guess. And she wasn't going to tell him if he asked.

A crash echoed from the kitchen. He heard her swear, and smirked. She was still utter crap at hand-eye coordination.

But when he heard her cursing herself, calling herself stupid and useless, and other things that she would never had called herself before, Mickey knew something was totally wrong.

He went into the kitchen, carefully, afraid of what he might find. The kettle was on the floor, not broken. Nothing had spilled. Rose was on the floor, her face buried in her hands.

Mickey knelt beside her. "Rose?"

She lifted her face. "Yeah, sorry. Just dropped the kettle."

They both knew that wasn't what he was asking.

Her hands dropped to the floor. "You know how I am. You used to poke fun at me cuz of this-" she gestured to the kettle. "I thought it was funny too."

"What happened?"

Tears began to well up in her eyes. "Every time it happened, he would hit me, and tell me I was stupid and useless and I could never amount to anything."

Mickey frowned.

"And I guess I started to believe him. Cuz look at me now."

"Rose." Mickey reached out his hand.

She didn't take it. She looked up at him, ready to tell him everything.

And, seated on the kitchen floor, she told him the whole story. Every frightening night, every solitary walk through the city, spilled from her lips as the tears fell freely.

As she finished with the doctor's diagnosis of being totally scared of men, she began to look a little desperate.

"And that's why I need you." she finished. "I hate myself right now, when I'm scared of people for no reason."

"What do you need?" He asked her, ready to give her anything she could possibly want.

"I need to not be scared." Rose said, hesitantly. "I need you to show me that there's nothing to be afraid of."

Mickey nodded. He could see where she was getting at.

"I trust you." Rose said, tears falling down her face. "I trust you entirely. And I'm really sorry for everything I did."

Mickey began to feel his own eyes prick with tears. He gathered up his courage, and leaned in slowly to give her a hug.

She closed her eyes tightly, tensing her muscles, but she lifted her arms and hugged him back.

The setting could leave a little to be desired, but it was still great to have his Rose right back where she needed to be.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

He showed up at Jackie's the next night. Jackie answered the door, and pulled him in for a long hug.

"She really needs you right now." Jackie whispered in his ear.

He nodded as Rose came around the corner.

"Ready to go?" he asked her.

"Go?"

"I'm taking you out for chips." Mickey said, with as much finality as he could muster.

"Oh." Rose couldn't help her face from lighting up. "Okay. Lemme get my jacket."

As she left the room, Jackie turned to Mickey. "I haven't seen her smile like that for a long time."

Mickey nodded. He'd missed it.

"Okay, all ready." Rose stood by Mickey.

Jackie waved them out. "Have fun!"

They walked down the road in silence, until Mickey held out his hand.

She hesitated, but then took it carefully.

He could feel how scared she really was.

They entered the bright warmth of her favorite chip shop. The greasy, salty, delicious smell perked Rose up even more.

By the time they were seated in a booth, she was smiling like she had before Jimmy.

"I haven't had chips in so long!" she exclaimed, digging into hers.

Mickey's heart hurt. Why had he done these terrible things to someone so perfect? Denied of company and love and her favorite food. It was a wonder she hadn't gone mad.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

"Thanks Mickey." Rose said gratefully as they left the shop. "That was amazing."

Mickey smiled down at her. "Anything for my little sister."

Rose smiled, and reached for his hand. Already, she felt fine around him. He made her feel safe.

Just as a brother should.

She laughed at him then, because she really liked being his little sister.

She sighed. She hadn't felt this nice in so long. It was so relaxing to feel safe.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Over weeks, and months, and almost a year, Mickey brought back the happy, smiling Rose that was lost to Jimmy.

She spent almost all her free time with him. He brought out for chips, to the movies, on walks around the city.

She would laugh and hold his hand. Just like a brother and sister.

But when an old woman in the park remarked on how nice a couple they were, neither of them corrected her.

Later, as they laid on her bed, she called attention to it.

"Are we really a couple?" she asked him.

He looked over at her. "I dunno. Do you think we are?"

She half-laughed and looked back at him. "Well, to everyone else around us we sure look like it."

He shook his head. "Do you want us to be?"

She lifted her head. "I never thought about it before."

He sat up then, and pulled her up.

"Cuz we'd save a lot of explaining if we were." he pointed out.

She smirked. "Do you want us to be?"

You couldn't tell, but he was blushing like crazy. "Maybe I do."

She smiled. "Okay."

"Okay?" he was confused. "Just like that?"

She shrugged. "Sure. If you really wanted, you could get down on one knee and proclaim your undying love for me, but that's a little too much, I think."

Mickey laughed. "I think so."

"So if we are a couple now, can I try something?"

Confused, he nodded.

Rose bit her lip. This would be the first time she'd done this since Jimmy. But she needed to see if she was still afraid. And Mickey wouldn't blame her if she was still too scared.

She leaned closer to his face and kissed him, right on the lips. It was a tiny kiss, but it was a big step for Rose.

Mickey couldn't stop his heart from taking off in his chest. Rose was kissing him.

But a second later, it was over.

"Okay?" he asked her. He knew what she was doing.

She nodded. "Yeah. Fine." Her eyes lit up with joy. Could she possibly be getting better?

Mickey grinned right along with her.

"Mind if I try again?" she asked him, leaning closer.

"Not at all."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-. 

**A/N  
>Hopefully this ends up being somewhat long...<strong>

**I'm really not a huge fan of Rose/Mickey, but it did happen, and I do accept that. Grudgingly.**

**I tried to get Mickey's story as canon as possible, as seen in Father's Day. I ****might have**** probably got things wrong, but it had to make sense for the story too. Please don't hate me, all you numerous Mickey fans!**


	7. Chapter 7

Six months passed, then another year.

Rose was still happy.

Her mother had supported her and Mickey officially getting together wholeheartedly. Jackie knew and trusted Mickey.

Mickey still fell head over heels for her, whenever he saw her.

But Rose wasn't actually sure if she loved him the right way. She tried to convince herself there was no 'right' way to love, but when the feeling felt wrong in general, it probably was.

But she still didn't feel totally at ease with any other man. So she needed him to feel safe, and normal. And after a while, she gave him her body, to try to compensate her conscience.

The first time it had happened was another one of Rose's little trials, to see if she could do it.

She kept this one to herself though.

Her mum was out at one of her men's houses. Mickey had come over for dinner and a movie. They'd eaten a romantic dinner of order-in Italian food, then sat on the couch to watch their movie.

Rose had been contemplating the setup of their relationship all day. She felt like she was taking advantage of him. It was obvious he loved her to the ends of the earth, but she wasn't sure she felt like that. She felt like she was just using him for protection against things she was still scared of.

It felt terrible. If there was only something she could give him to make the strange little bargain more fair.

She knew there was. But she hadn't done it since Jimmy.

She wasn't sure if she would be brave enough for it.

But as soon as she thought that, it was like a challenge. Like she had to show someone that she was brave enough.

So she kissed him far more passionately than usual, and pulled him off the couch into her room.

He knew, of course, what she wanted.

"Are you sure?" He'd asked her. He didn't want to ruin everything.

"Positive." She smiled, and dragged him down onto the bed.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

She gave him that almost every week, letting her conscience rest. It seemed a fair bargain now.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

"Happy birthday Rose!" Jackie sang as she walked into the kitchen. "Here- have a present."

Rose smiled from her seat at the table. "Wow, thanks mum."

Jackie handed her the present. "Here you go. And don't worry about it."

Rose carefully unwrapped it, revealing a short, silky red dress.

"Mum!"

Jackie grinned. "I think it'll look wonderful, don't you? Best not put it on now, that's Mickey at the door."

Rose placed the cover back on the box. Mickey was in for a nice surprise tonight.

Jackie peered around the corner. "Ready to go, love? He's got the fair tickets."

Rose nodded, and ran to get her jacket.

Mickey was waiting by the door. "Happy birthday!" he said happily. "Let's go on our adventure!"

They held hands through the park, on their way to the fair. He stroked her hair, smiled at everything she said. He really was the perfect boyfriend, she thought to herself. Totally, totally perfect.

So why did it feel so wrong?

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

The answer came late that night, as she laid awake in bed.

Mickey slept softy beside her, their fingers intertwined.

She had been trying to name the feeling she'd had for almost a year now. Now, relaxed in bed, feeling safe, she had found the name of the feeling.

She was waiting.

She smiled to herself in the darkness. Maybe she could figure out what she was waiting for.

Maybe it was a sign, that if she found what she was waiting for, her life would get better.

Hopefully it would come soon. She wouldn't stay young forever. The nineteen candles on her birthday cake the day before had reminded her of all the time Jimmy had taken from her.

All the time she could have spent becoming a better person, going to school, learning about love, was wasted in a murderer's bed.

The thought was enough to make her cry. Just a little.

Because, no matter how good her life was, she still saw Jimmy's angry face behind her closed eyes, coming closer and closer.

She was almost positive that nothing would make it go away.

But now she knew she was waiting for something. And when it came, she was going to jump on the chance to regain those lost years. Because she wanted her life to mean something.

Nothing was going to stop her.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

And sure enough, the chance came. In a little blue police box.

From the very first words~ "Run!" Rose knew that this was her chance.

The Doctor.

This was where she would find her star, she was sure of it.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

So when he asked her to come with him, her heart soared.

But then she looked back at Mickey. Purely by accident. But the complete desolation and loss in his eyes was so heart-wrenching, that Rose faltered.

What would Mickey and her mum do without her? She wasn't going to abandon them again.

So she turned away. Away from the chance she knew in her heart she should take.

But then he came back. Right away. Just to tell her that it traveled in time.

Oh, whatever. Mickey could manage. So could her mum. She ran for the TARDIS, ready for her chance at a life that was going to be worth something.

A life with the Doctor.

…

**A/N**

**Darn it all, another short one. **

**The next chapter'll be up tomorrow, approximately. I'm glad people are still enjoying this! **


	8. Chapter 8

The Doctor. With his green jumper, leather jacket, and enormous ears, he whisked Rose around the universe, his grin lighting up the TARDIS, "Fantastic!" echoing around the console room.

She spent her waking hours with the Doctor, laughing, running from aliens, having marvelous adventures.

And she felt glorious. This was the chance to make her life better, and she was going after it. She wasn't sure what she had to do, but she was going to figure it out.

She knew, somehow, it would directly involve the Doctor. Somehow, fate had brought them together. So obviously there was something to be done.

She didn't normally believe in that stuff, but this once, she knew somehow.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

But no matter how tired she was from the adventures, no matter how happy she was with the Doctor, every night she would wake, crying silently into her pillow, the old nightmares haunting the darkness behind her eyelids.

The Doctor never heard her when she cried, and she didn't want him to. He saw her as a brave, brilliant, strong girl, and she didn't want his image of her ruined by her past, where she'd been so weak, and stupid, and cowardly.

Because she knew she wasn't. The Doctor made her finally believe that. Finally she recognized herself for being brave and brilliant. It made her so happy. And so grateful to the Doctor, who wanted nothing from her but her company on his adventures.

She quite loved him. Not as a boyfriend, obviously, he was (well, looked), much too old for that, but more as a brother.

When she found out his age, around 900, (give or take, he said) she half-laughed at the irony. She'd moved in with another older man. What would her mum say?

But the Doctor couldn't be compared to Jimmy in any way whatsoever. That much was obvious. And he made her feel safer than even Mickey had.

She wasn't scared of the face in her dreams. Well, yes, she was terrified, but as soon as she saw the Doctor's face, her terror would vanish.

She got so used to that smiling face with big ears.

So when he changed, she was terrified.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

He wasn't her Doctor anymore. He was some stranger, who knew everything her Doctor knew, but was nothing like her Doctor at all.

He was tall, gangly, thin. He was really weird. He smiled all the time. He wore glasses when he really didn't need them. He wore pinstripes and Converse, instead of perfectly normal clothes, like a leather jacket and boots. He didn't like pears. His hair was all sticky-uppy, like he carefully used some product every morning. He had sideburns. And brown eyes.

Right from the beginning, he'd smiled and joked with her. She hated it. The man she'd trusted with her life over the past year had done something so frightening, there was nothing that she could think of to remedy the situation. So she said those words she'd thought she'd never say.

"Take me home."

The obvious look of absolute self-hatred on the Doctor's new face almost changed her mind.

But then he keeled over.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

**A/N  
>Ugh. I despise short chapters. I keep having to cut them off though. I'm seriously sorry about the shortness of this one. Next one'll be up… probably later today, actually.<strong>

**Anyway. This was a total switch for me. Trying to describe the virtues of 9, and all the reasons why 10 (to Rose at the beginning) sucked.**

…**I feel so disloyal…**

**10 fans, you're with me here, right?**

**Next chapter should be sort of long. And then, I shall finally achieve where I was originally going with this story!**

**But actually, this really has turned into the story of Rose's past in general.**


	9. Chapter 9

It was during that first adventure, the Christmas Invasion, they were calling it, that Rose decided that the new Doctor was definitely her Doctor.

Once he woke up, he was funny, and brilliant, and brave.

All the good parts of the old Doctor, with extra, funny, weirdness.

And much better looking too.

During their next few adventures, Rose could found some similarities, to her slight relief, between this new Doctor, and the old Doctor.

Mostly, he was still totally obsessed with bananas. This one little quirk erased any remaining doubts of his identity.

But she took mental notes of the little quirks that had changed.

"Fantastic!" was replaced with "Brilliant!"

He actually cared about his appearance now, dressing in his favourite brown pinstripe suit, dress shirt and tie, every day.

But what was the most astonishing difference was how much this new Doctor cared, about her, and about people in general. But mostly her.

She realized this one dark night, as she woke up, yet again, from the usual nightmares. She cried into her pillow, as usual, wishing that she could just forget. She would give anything to forget.

She knew she would sleep again, only to be woken again by those terrible nights reliving themselves.

As tears fell silently, save for her little gasps of air, her bedroom door opened softly. The Doctor poked his head in. "Rose?"

She lifted her tear streaked face to the sound of his voice, so worried, and unsure.

"Can I come in?" he asked her, already over the threshold.

She nodded, tears still making their way out of her eyes.

He sat on her bed next to her, and pulled her into his arms. He held her there until she'd stopped crying, resting his cheek against her hair.

"What's wrong?" he asked quietly.

"Nothing." Rose said. "Just a nightmare."

The Doctor lifted her head with a finger under her chin. "You're crying, though, like something was sad."

She shook her head. "I'm fine."

The Doctor looked down at her. "If you're sure..."

She nodded, and took his hand. "Why'd you come in here?"

He frowned. "I dunno. I wasn't sleeping, obviously, just sort of wandering around. I heard you crying. I suppose it's instinct in this new body. When I hear you cry, I have to see you." he smiled sheepishly. "Sort of stalkerish, I guess..."

Rose smiled and shook her head. "No!" she held his hand tighter. "It's the first time you've done this though."

He frowned. "The nightmares come often?"

She shrugged. "Every night."

His eyes widened. His old self had been so oblivious! How could he just not see Rose suffering?

"You never say anything." he told her. "I can help you, you know."

"You do help." she said softly. "I see you in the morning, and I'm not scared anymore."

He rubbed her hand. "But all night-"

She shrugged. "It doesn't matter, does it?"

Of course it matters! He wanted to cry. You matter! If you're scared, you should tell me!

But she was acting as she should, and did, with his ninth self. She still hadn't figured out this regeneration.

Well, neither had he, so that was fine. But now was their chance to find out.

He carefully shoved Rose over to make room on the bed, and then laid down beside her.

"Doctor?"

"Hm?"

"...What are you doing?"

He looked over at her. She was staring at him with an arched eyebrow.

"Keeping you safe from the nightmares." he said. "Now go to sleep. Big day tomorrow."

She nodded, hesitantly, and lay beside him, carefully not touching him.

That's what his ninth self would have wanted. But in this body, he wanted to feel Rose's hand in his. He wanted her hugs.

Her hugs were a necessary part of every day, actually.

So he grabbed her around the waist and pulled her to him.

She squeaked. "What are you doing?"

"I don't know." he answered truthfully.

But she didn't protest, and snuggled up against his pinstripes.

Surrounded by his particular smell of tea and time, she fell asleep, breathing softly against his chest.

He loved the feeling of closeness. He loved the feeling of safety Rose gave him. He loved everything about Rose. He loved Rose.

Wait.

He stopped for a second.

Did he really?

Maybe he did. His mind was wired for the facts, and he reviewed them. Ever since he'd met her, he'd been taken with her.

Even his ninth self had been slightly in love with her, although he probably wouldn't have admitted it to save reality.

But this one was different. In this body, he felt good. He felt young, energetic. Totally brilliant, in fact.

Maybe he could acknowledge his feelings toward Rose in this body.

He almost laughed out loud at the thought.

Yeah right.

As if.

The Doctor couldn't be in love with a human.

Totally inconceivable. He could love her, of course, but like a brother. Or maybe like the dad she'd never had.

Yes, that was much more understandable. Much safer, for the both of them.

He looked down at her, then. Her hand was still entwined in his. She looked like an angel as she slept.

He sighed. This new body would take some getting used to.

But he had Rose, and that was really what mattered.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Rose woke up feeling totally rested.

It was such a strange feeling, that she lay, without opening her eyes, to try and figure it out.

She hadn't had a nightmare.

That was it.

She remembered the events of last night, of course. But after she'd fallen asleep against the Doctor, she'd slept, totally dreamlessly.

The Doctor had made her nightmares go away.

She opened her eyes slightly, and reached out to see if he was still there.

Her hand brushed his.

"Morning." he said, in a totally awake voice. "How did you sleep?"

Rose sat up carefully, blinking the sleep from her eyes. "Fine, actually. That hasn't happened for a few years..."

Again, the Doctor cursed the inattention of his ninth self. "A few years?"

She nodded. "But why didn't you sleep?"

Carefully turning the attention away from that part of her life.

"I don't normally sleep." the Doctor told her. "Time Lord. Superior biology."

Rose rolled her eyes. "Right."

He deflected the question carefully. He didn't want her to know about his nightmares. Of burning planets and crying children.

"What do you say to a little trip?" he asked, changing the subject. "Breakfast at the restaurant at the end of the universe?"

She giggled. "That's a real place?"

"Of course!" the Doctor exclaimed. "Douglas Adams knew what he was talking about."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

**A/N  
>Ah, denial. Fun to write... Anyway, I somehow feel the quality of chapters has been decreasing. I have been proofing extensively after I write each one, but please tell me if they're downgrading.<strong>

**I've been working on my other fic a small amount, so updates might possibly take a teensy bit longer than usual, but I don't want to abandon the other one.**


	10. Chapter 10

The TARDIS wheezed into existence, fitting perfectly between Rose's bed and dresser in her old room in Jackie's flat.

"How long are we staying here, exactly?" the Doctor asked, as they exited the TARDIS.

"Why?" Rose giggled. "Afraid my mum'll kiss you again?"

"That really couldn't have been classified as a kiss. Rose." the Doctor said, rather frankly. "It was more of a full on snog."

Just hearing the Doctor say the word 'snog' was almost too much for Rose to handle.

"I wonder where mum went..." Rose said, as she entered the kitchen. "And do you want tea?"

The Doctor had already sprawled on the couch and turned the TV on. "Yeah."

Rose shook her head. The Doctor refused to contemplate domesticity, but here he was, watching telly in her mum's flat.

She opened up the cupboards, searching for tea. There was none.

"Mum must have gone shopping." she went into the living room, where the Doctor was watching a documentary on Stephan Hawking. "We have no tea left. Or any food, for that matter."

The Doctor didn't look away from the screen. "There's some in the TARDIS kitchen. You just went shopping, remember?"

Rose shook her head. Of course she remembered. It was a huge food shop on a random planet~ where she'd bought things that looked somewhat like what she was used to. The Doctor had left her on her own, using TARDIS repairs as an excuse to avoid the domesticness of shopping.

"I'll wait till mum gets home." Rose settled down on the couch next to the Doctor.

He finally tore his eyes away from the screen. It was a commercial. "Too lazy?"

"You're one to talk." Rose leaned against him.

"I haven't recovered from running from those aliens with the long sucker-things." He said. "And if I haven't, you definitely haven't. So that was really the only reason I agreed to this trip, was because you were tired and needed a break from all the travel-"

Rose put a finger to his lips. "I get it."

He smiled sheepishly. "Sorry."

Rose rolled her eyes, but made herself comfortable.

"Ow, Rose." the Doctor adjusted them so they were lying next to eachother. "Now stay there."

She nodded. But he was right, she was totally exhausted. So she snuggled up against him and closed her eyes.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

She was awakened by Jackie's shriek of delight when she saw them on the couch.

She was totally disoriented from sleep, or the lack thereof, so she didn't really register the Doctor rubbing the sleep from his own eyes.

Jackie pulled her up into a hug. "You're finally back!"

Rose noticed the clock as Jackie pulled the Doctor into a hug. "Mum, where were you?"

"Shopping." Jackie answered. "The bloody car broke down and I had to walk home."

The Doctor struggled out of Jackie's grasp. "Why don't I go and get it?"

Anything to escape her dreaded hugs!

Jackie brightened. "That'd be great. The ice cream is going to be all melted though."

At the mention of ice cream, the Doctor perked up considerably. "What are we waiting for? Come on Rose!"

Rose smiled. He was just like a little puppy. "Actually, I'm gonna stay here. I'll get the food out of the TARDIS, so when you get back, there'll be a nice alien meal waiting for ya."

The Doctor deflated. "Oh. Okay then."

Jackie laughed. "It won't do you any harm to be separated, Doctor. I think you'll survive. Besides, I'm coming with you."

A look of utter horror passed over his face. "Wait-"

Jackie pulled him out the door.

Rose waved. "Bring back some bananas."

"Will do!" Jackie shouted, over the Doctor's protests.

Rose laughed, then went to find the food she'd bought.

Coming out of the TARDIS, her arms full of alien food, she walked in the kitchen door, trying to think of what she should do with it. How did you cook condensed egg, anyway?

As she was reading the boxed ingredients, the door to the flat creaked open.

"Done already?" Rose called. "Sorry, the food's not ready yet."

Hearing someone come into the kitchen, she looked up.

Right into the barrel of a gun.

But the thing that scared her most was the person who was behind it.

"Jimmy." she murmured faintly. She could barely hear her own voice.

"Hullo, Rosie." Jimmy smiled a terrible smile. "Happy to see me again?"

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

**A/N  
>Aren't I just terrible, leaving it off at a place like this?<strong>

**But lucky you, it'll be updated shortly, seeing as I have the next three chapters already written. I've achieved double digits!**

**I'm glad you're all still enjoying it. I don't know **_**what**_** I'm going to do once I finish it. How depressing is that...**


	11. Chapter 11

"Pack your things, Rosie." Jimmy said. "You're coming home with me."

"No." Rose said. Her breath came up short, she was so scared. But she wasn't going with Jimmy.

"Why's that?" He still held the gun at her.

"I've got someone else."

NOT a wise thing to say. Jimmy growled, and gave her a vicious backhand.

She fell to the floor, holding her face. She was just as weak as she'd always been. She could face Slitheen, Daleks, and hordes of gas-masked people, but she couldn't stand up to this man.

"Fucking whore." Jimmy growled. "I'm gone for a year, and you 'find someone else'. You're coming with me, Rosie, and to hell with your boyfriend!"

She shivered on the floor. The nightmares were coming back.

"Hurry UP!" Jimmy shouted, kicking her. "I'm not waiting here all day."

She would have to go with him. There was a chance the Doctor would come and find her. There was also a chance he would leave, when he saw she'd left.

She got up slowly. She knew the Doctor would come and find her.

Rose left the kitchen, Jimmy following. But she couldn't go into her room, as the TARDIS was in there.

She turned to Jimmy. "I don't have anything to bring."

"Where'd it all go?" he snarled. "Did you move in with your new boyfriend like the little whore you are?"

Rose hesitated. "I've been traveling."

"I don't fucking care. Get in the truck then."

He shoved her out the door, the gun still pointed at her back.

She climbed carefully in the old black truck. Sharp things poked out randomly, the floor was littered with beer cans.

"Just like old times, eh, Rosie?" Jimmy leered from the drivers seat. "But just to warn ya, if you try a little stunt like before, I've got this gun now, for you, your mum, and maybe even your new 'boyfriend'"

Rose gasped. He was going to kill them?

"Just do what I say." Jimmy laughed. "And maybe you can save your mum. But the boyfriend's got to go."

"You can't!" Rose cried.

"I can." he turned up glare at her as they pulled into the parking lot of the old flat. "Here we are. Home sweet home."

Rose climbed the stairs up to the flat, staring up at the sky. She thought she was free of this, of him.

Never free, her mind whispered. Never ever free.

Jimmy pushed her into the flat. "It got a little messy." He laughed. "So start cleaning."

It was even more disgusting than when she'd moved in the first time. She shuddered.

"Hurry up, Rosie." Jimmy lay on the couch. "And bring me a beer."

Never free, her mind reminded her, as she moved toward the kitchen.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

"That should be fine." The Doctor said, holding his sonic screwdriver above the dashboard. "Is the ice cream doomed?"

"Unfortunately." Jackie said from the back. "But Rose wants bananas, so we can get more ice cream too."

"Great." The Doctor grinned and jumped into the passenger side.

They drove to the store in comfortable silence, until Jackie cleared her throat, ready to ask him something.

"Listen, Doctor."

He looked up, panic in his eyes. "Yeah?" he squeaked.

She laughed. "I'm not going to slap you."

He laughed along with her. "Okay."

"Just wondering..." Jackie began. "How are you and Rose getting on?"

The Doctor raised his eyebrows. Huh. Wasn't expecting a question like that. "I don't know." He didn't.

"Yes, you do." Jackie said. "No avoiding the question."

He knew he loved her. A lot. He knew he needed her to feel complete. He wanted her beside him every minute. Her hugs were needed every day.

He wanted it to be more than that though. He knew it was selfish, but he wanted to feel her kisses, he wanted to hear her whisper in his ear those three words he dreaded saying first.

He wanted her to love him like he loved her. He wanted a relationship.

How much more domestic could you get? He laughed, quietly to himself.

"There's nothing going on." he told Jackie truthfully, sadly. "Nothing at all."

She cocked her eyebrow. "Really?"

He nodded.

"When I walked in on you two before, you seemed pretty close. Sleeping together, holding hands in your sleep, pretty much screams of relationship."

Did it?

He supposed it did. Slightly mollified, he tried to rationalize it in his head. Physical boundaries and personal space didn't exist with Rose. He just wanted to feel her near him all the time. It seemed like she felt the same way. After all, she was the one who'd lain on top of him.

"Nothing at all of the sort." he confirmed, as they pulled into the store.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Rose carefully whispered past the slumbering form of Jimmy as she cleaned the carpet. She daren't make her escape. He would kill her and her mum and the Doctor.

She picked up the laundry from the floor. Most of her old clothes were still here. She couldn't face the memories to have come back and got them.

She tensed when she felt Jimmy's caressing hand over her back. "Morning Rosie. I'm bored. Fancy a shag?"

NO! She wanted to scream. Never with you again! Instead she let herself be pulled onto the couch, squeezing her eyes shut.

He forced himself into her, again and again. He'd become even rougher, and she found herself crying out in pain.

When he'd finally finished, bruises were blossoming across her arms and legs. Her face was streaked with tears. She was in some of the worst pain of her life.

The Doctor still hadn't come.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

**A/N**

**Sorry to drag this out so much... But it's all got happen, believe me.**

**I am also having MAJOR problems writing the final showdown... I've rewritten it 3 times, all completely different each time. *glares at blank document* **


	12. Chapter 12

"Rooose!" The Doctor called as he and Jackie made their way back into the flat. "Are you cooking?"

No answer. He felt a prickle of anxiety. Was she okay?

Of course she was. He dismissed the feeling. She was Rose, for reality's sake.

The feeling came back as he entered the kitchen- which was devoid of Rose.

"Rose?" he called again. "Are you here?"

He went through the flat, to no avail.

"Don't get so worried, Doctor." Jackie put on the kettle. "She probably just went out with her friend Shareen."

She would have left a note then. He wanted to protest. He went into her room. Of course! The TARDIS! He sighed in relief. Jackie's kitchen probably didn't have the right appliances to cook the alien food with.

He dashed into the TARDIS kitchen.

No Rose.

He dashed back to the console, anxiety growing into something that vaguely resembled panic. He did a check for life on board the TARDIS, but got only himself.

She wasn't in the flat, and wasn't in the TARDIS.

She was somewhere in London.

He entered Jackie's kitchen, his face clearly showing his emotions.

"I'm telling you, she's fine." Jackie looked up from her cup of tea.

She smirked as the Doctor went back to the TARDIS. Of course there was 'nothing of the sort' going on.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Rose had calculated the timing of the Doctor. He was late. He should have realized she was missing by now and somehow found a way to find her. If he didn't show up soon, she knew he would have left.

Night had fallen. Jimmy had slept almost the entire day, so now he was ready for sex.

He got rougher and rougher as the night wore on. She hurt all over. Tears crawled down her face.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

"Jackie, it's ten o'clock." the Doctor paced up and down the flat. "I'm going to find her."

Jackie was getting slightly uneasy as well. "Okay then."

The Doctor rushed back to the TARDIS console. He started the program he'd written awhile back. It searched the universe for Rose, and gave exact coordinates for her whereabouts. It took an hour or so, but the Doctor was too worried to wait. He transferred all the power of the TARDIS into the one program. The result flashed up in less than five minutes.

It was an address in the lower section of London. It was all he needed. He dashed out of the TARDIS, out of the flat, without so much as a see-you-later to Jackie.

Rose came first, no matter what.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

He'd thrown her to the ground, effectively breaking her ankle, and quite possibly her arm again.

"Get up." he told her, his voice slurred with the beer and drugs.

She shivered. No escape. She dragged herself to her feet. The pain didn't register anymore.

Jimmy dragged her into bed again. She cried out as he hit her broken arm.

He paid no attention.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

There was the flat. The Doctor looked up at it. It was a dark looking place. What was Rose doing here?

He found the flat number, and considered knocking, but then decided against it. Rude to the core, that was him. He pushed the door open silently.

He heard nothing and then crying.

Rose crying, there was no mistaking it.

Adrenaline rushed through his body as he quietly moved so he could observe what was happening to her.

Through the open door to the bedroom, he saw her, laying on a filthy mattress, being brutally raped by a man who was obviously drunk and high off several drugs.

Before he knew what was happening, a red mist coloured the scene in front of him. He tasted red in his mouth. His fists clenched by his sides. He walked toward the bedroom.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Rose had given up hope when she heard the voice she'd been waiting for.

"Get your filthy hands off her."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

**A/N**

**The next chapter might take a little longer to update, cuz I just can't get it right. I'm trying to do what I (and everyone else, I presume) wants to happen, without making the Doctor too terribly OOC. And that doesn't really work...**

**But I have to make it perfect before posting no matter what, so bear with me, please!**

**On another note~**

**I have explicitly put down all the stuff that makes this rated T. Namely, language, suggestive themes and rape. If there's something else you feel that needs to be put in the summary, please tell me. I'm not going to up the rating, because frankly, I don't believe this is M rated stuff. I've read other T rated things that were much more explicit than this.**

**I'm glad you all are still liking it, and I actually did get another plot bunny, so when this is done, I'll be concentrating on that. :)**

**Thanks for reading!  
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	13. Chapter 13

Rose gasped and looked up into the terrifying face of the Doctor.

Jimmy heaved himself off the bed, ready to deal with him.

The Doctor was surprised at how angry he felt. Red mist seemed to taint the scene before him. He tasted copper in his mouth.

Jimmy smirked at the Doctor. "I suppose you're the boyfriend?"

The Doctor paid no attention to his words. All he was really interested in doing was killing him.

But Jimmy had his gun. So he pulled it out of his back pocket and turned it on the Doctor.

His eyes growing wide, the Doctor carefully reached into his suit pocket for his screwdriver.

But Jimmy's hand twitched on the trigger before the Doctor had time to press the button that would make Jimmy's gun explode.

The small room burst with sound and the smell of gunpowder.

Rose crumpled to the floor in front of the Doctor.

Jimmy grunted and reloaded his gun.

Panic gripped the Doctor's heart like ice. Rose was shot! Rose had jumped in front of him to save him!

His numb fingers found the screwdriver and pressed the button.

Jimmy's gun shattered into a million fragments.

Panic fused with anger and the Doctor became the Oncoming Storm.

Jimmy crouched on the floor, terrified, no longer with a weapon.

The Doctor knelt next to him, and placed his fingers on Jimmy's head, as if to comfort.

And slowly, Jimmy's mind was twisted, twisted into reliving all of the worst moments of his victims, the terror and the pain. Slowly, all his memories were steeped in terror, images of Bad Wolf and the Oncoming Storm, revenging and avenging all the people Jimmy had hurt or killed.

The process left the Doctor just enough anger to trap Jimmy in the shadows of reality, where he would live forever, haunted by images, memories and emotions.

And he would never hurt anyone again.

And as he disappeared, panic once again replaced all feelings the Doctor had. Rose was shot.

He crawled toward her limp form.

"Rose."

No answer.

"Rose, please."

Panic squeezed his heart and lungs. He felt like he was drowning.

He carefully rolled her over so she was facing up.

Her shoulder was bleeding profusely. That's where she'd been shot. He patted her pockets for her cell phone. He took it out carefully and dialed Jackie with shaking hands.

"Rose!" Jackie answered. "Where on earth are you? The Doctor's out looking for you. You need-"

"Jackie." The Doctor cut in. "I need help. There's been an accident."

Jackie stopped breathing for a second. "What happened? What do you need?"

"Call a hospital, an ambulance. Anything." He managed to give her the address before he dropped the phone.

"Rose." He tried again. "Rose please. Wake up."

Her eyes stayed shut.

"You can't die Rose." The Doctor grabbed her hand. "You can't. We were going to have more adventures. Together, forever. You promised me forever. You just can't do this."

He stayed there, holding her, waiting for her to wake up.

He was still there when Jackie crashed through the door with several medical personnel.

He got up and held Jackie as she started to cry and gasp in shock. He never thought he'd be comforting Jackie Tyler. And he never thought that he'd need comforting. Least of all by Jackie Tyler.

**A/N**

**I'm actually happy with the way this turned out. Five rewrites later.**

**I tried to have the Doctor kill Jimmy, but it didn't work like that. It can't, actually.**

**Next chapter should be the last.**

**Quite depressing, actually.**

**I'm sorry it was so short…**


	14. Chapter 14

Rose was taken up to the hospital, into surgery to remove the bullet and fix her broken arm and ankle.

The Doctor and Jackie stayed in the waiting room the whole time, their hands tightly clasped together.

It was in these long hours that the Doctor came to a slightly astounding thought.

Why would she throw herself in front of him to take a bullet?

She knew he would regenerate. But she had saved him. She'd saved this form.

But she was stuck in surgery, not even conscious, with possible mind damage.

Why?

Jackie had relayed the story of Jimmy during one of the many hours. It had made him angry all over again.

He hoped with his entire soul and hearts that Rose's mind would be okay. That she'd be able to feel his hand in hers without being frightened.

Just thinking about that made him scared and angry.

He needed Rose.

He refused to contemplate what would happen if she wasn't okay.

He just wouldn't.

Finally, the surgeons came out, looking extremely exhausted.

Jackie leapt up for the news. The Doctor stayed where he was, hands clenched, ears pricked.

She was fine, they reported. Just fine.

The Doctor's hearts lightened of the weight of the universe.

She was fine.

She was alive.

He got up then, heading to her room.

He opened her door quietly. Jackie had had to go off with the doctors to sign some papers.

Rose was laying on the white bed, several tubes poking out of her arm. Her shoulder was bound tightly up in white bandages. Her arm and ankles were both in plaster casts.

But she was breathing and alive and her mind was going to be okay.

The Doctor was so happy he felt a little like crying.

But he just sat right next to her and held her hand.

He would hold her hand forever.

Because he loved her.

Yes, he thought. He loved Rose Tyler. And as soon as she woke up, he was going to tell her.

Because he didn't want to waste a day, when something like this could happen, and not be so lucky.

Rose could die and if he never told her he loved her, he'd probably die too.

Jackie still hadn't arrived when Rose's hand twitched.

The Doctor jumped up slightly. "Rose?" He whispered.

Her breathing grew slightly louder as she slowly made her way through the haze of painkillers. "Doctor?"

"Yes." His hand tightened slightly on hers. "I'm here."

Her eyes opened slowly. He smiled at her. Grinned at her, because she was fine. She was just fine.

Her hand gripped his. "What happened?"

Two simple words.

He shook his head. "Jimmy shot you."

Her brows furrowed. The drugs made it hard to think. But she had to know!

"And then?"

"Are you sure you want-"

She did her best glare.

He sighed, and smiled a little. "Jimmy shot you and then I got rid of him."

"How?"

Always asking the right questions. "I twisted his mind around, so all he could feel was the fear and pain he caused all the people he'd hurt. Then I trapped him somewhere where he'll never escape and he'll live on forever."

"The vortex?"

"Sort of. More like where the fourth wall, the curtain of reality, wrinkles at the corner. No one will be able to find him. And he'll never get out."

"Good."

"And he'll never hurt anyone again."

She smiled at him. A lovely Rose smile that made his hearts sing.

Because he loved her.

And he needed to tell her.

"Rose."

The talking was making her more tired. "Yeah?"

"I wanted to tell you-" He blushed slightly. (No~ Time Lords don't blush) How could he say it?

"Why'd you jump in front of me?"

Not what she'd been expecting. "I saw the gun." She stopped to rest. "And he was pointing it at you. And I-" Now it was her turn to blush. "I didn't want you to get hurt."

It made him completely sad. Here she was, almost bound up like a mummy in plaster and bandages.

And he was fine.

Because of her.

"You know I'd regenerate." It wasn't a question.

Her hand gripped tightly once again. "I like you right now."

Of course she did. This one had been made for her.

He smiled again. "I know."

And he wanted to tell her. He wanted to say it. Just three little words.

"Rose?"

Again? "What?"

"I think-" Yes, this was good. "I think I'm actually-"

She kept looking at him. He had to get it out.

"I think I'm in love with you." There. He'd said it.

She kept looking at him.

"Rose?"

Her face turned very pink.

"I think I'm in love with you too."

He grinned again.

"Really?"

"Of course, really." She wished she could smack him. "Why else would I throw myself in front of a bullet for you?"

"That was because you loved me?"

Stupid. "Yes."

It was like Christmas. Only without the aliens.

He leaned carefully over her to kiss her. Gently. Wouldn't want to break anything.

"Are you going to wait for me?" Rose asked him, once he'd got back to his seat.

"What?"

"Until I get better." Rose explained. "It's going to take a while."

"I've got a while." He took her hand again. "And I'm not leaving without you. Ever."

Rose smiled. "Good." She felt herself going back to sleep.

"Rose?"

"Tired..."

He chuckled. "Okay."

"Stay." He could barely make out her words.

"Forever."

And it would be forever. And ever and ever and ever. Because he was fine and she was fine and they loved each other. 

**Fin**

**A/N  
>The end. Sigh... I hope this chapter was up to par. I can't write fluff. At all. Haha. :)<strong>

**Anyway, this was a brilliant story to write, and I am forever grateful to every single person who favorited and alerted, and even more grateful to those of you who reviewed. Cuz without you, there would be no story.**

**This was wonderful, everyone.**

**Thanks!**

**-Converse on the Tardis**


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